We all face barriers in our lives, barriers to a healthy self image, barriers to maturity, barriers to loving relationships, and barriers to knowing God. A lot of the time these barriers are self-imposed to protect us from the outside world that can seem so bitter and angry. Some barriers are imposed by others through years of ridicule, rejection and broken relationships. No wonder Freud had a field day with the human psyche!
We all know people who continue to play out year after year the same storyline, totally unable to move past the wall that has become their life.
Are you one of them? What are your biggest obstacles to growth? If not for you then for someone else...
What do you believe are your biggest Walls that have shaped your life and continue to challenge you to move fearlessly into the future.
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Specifically, my biggest wall is time. As a member of the US military, my time is extremely limited. I feel called to do X, but my faith, my family, and my job take up such a significant amount of time.
How do I change my story?
Background work
What is your calling? I’ve read your blog and you obviously have a deep faith. What is your calling? Work out of that knowledge and constantly refer back to your calling for guidance and direction. Your calling will help establish your priorities and silence the voices that are shouting “pick me first”.
If you still want to work on creating time consider this little assessment. Take it for what it’s worth and enjoy.
1. Select a habit (or feeling) you want to change.
1. “I’m feeling overwhelmed” > Time management
2. I feel called to do it all.
2. Identify the cue that triggers the behavior (why would you take on more than you can handle?)
1. I feel pressured to do more (financial, avoid conflict)
2. I feel guilty if I saying no (competitive nature)
3. I feel the excitement of something new, a new challenge
3. Understand the need the habit meets (the reward).
1. Busyness makes me feel important
2. I like making people happy
3. I hate to disappoint others
4. I love the rush of a new experience
4. Now, without changing the cue or the reward, replace the routine with a new, healthier behavior.
1. I love checking off a completed project
2. I love working on being the best husband, father, friend, etc.
3. I’m a work in progress and I’m fighting the busyness monster
Thanks for your insights in changing behavior. The first question stumps me though because there are very few habits that I wish to change. I just wish I could fit a few more into the 24 hours I have available.
If only I could define my calling in one sentence… I’d be set 🙂 Most of the things I feel called to (business, leadership, speaking, ministry) demand more time than I have available. And while I dabble in each of them occasionally, I am unable to give my heart to any of them.
Thanks again for taking the time to consider my situation personally.