Commandment #5 -- Honor Thy Spouses Past
For the last several weeks I've been mulling over the relationship between the 10 commandments as given to Moses in Exodus 20 as a model for relationships. I see the experience between God and the Hebrews at Mt. Sinai as kind of a marriage covenant. If we then take it all one step further, we can think about how we relate to one another through the lens of these commandments. I realize, of course, that I'm making a stretch with some of these and if you feel I've some how desecrated God's Holy Word, I beg your forgiveness. My intention is not to be theological but more philosophical and thus create more questions than I answer. I intend to create a dialogue and spark some interest in the commandments as a helpful tool for today, not just a fact in the history books of ancient Israel. So having said all that, here goes. Commandment #5 -- Honor thy spouses family. Most marriage consultants and eventually marriage counselors will tell you that there are some hot buttons in relationship that should just not be pushed. Criticizing your spouses family is one of them. By criticizing them you are in fact criticizing your spouse, their past, their personality you love, and the compassion that makes them love you. If you begin to belittle your spouse family, you are making fun of very sacred territory. Think about all your family has done for you, the way they have supported you, and the ways they have given you a future. If you don't respect your spouses family, they you disrespect your spouse and disasters will be close behind. Now believe me I realize that we don't all get along with our in-laws and sometimes they drive us to the edge. The point here is not to play Polly Anna but to realize that this too is part of your spouse and if you want to love and honor your spouse, then you simply must respect their family. On the flip side of this is your relationship with your own parents. Like it or not you are more like your parents than you realize. Psychologists tell us then even when we want to break away from the habits of our parents that may at times drive us crazy, when we are stressed and under pressure, we will eventually return to the same habits of our parents as an example of stability. All parents are accountable to God for the example they set for their children, and while there are plenty of dis-functional families in the world, we must learn to celebrate, honor, and respect the efforts our parents made on our behalf. Developing an attitude of gratitude will naturally cascade into our marriage relationship as well. Look for the Next couple of commandments in the coming weeks.Email Subscription: